OMG UPDATE: OMG Becky, look at her butt.

Updated on Thursday, November 19, 2015



Engineering Student 1: Yo, what do you know about that girl?

Engineering Student 2: Oh she hangs out with all the AFM kids.

Engineering Student 1: Oh damn. That means I have no chance.



"where all white girls at? starbucks"

Updated on Friday, November 13, 2015



"Life is too short to dance with fat chicks"



"Man, when I woke up this morning, I was not expecting to have joined a honky-tonk synth band by the end of the day."

Updated on Wednesday, November 11, 2015



"In the words of Rihanna: Bitch better have my money" - Philosophy Professor



"lets take a naked squad pic"

Updated on Friday, November 6, 2015



"Sean, you're so good. Your tongue is so flexible."

Updated on Tuesday, November 3, 2015



"I went to a party on the weekend and met a guy called breadcrumb"



Wars are good! the growth of potatoes can help with the war too.....because you know war is good



Overheard two janitors (male):

The washroom sink was full of hair stubs.

So? Somebody must have shaved there.

In the _women's_ washroom??

Shudder: as a woman what part would you shave in a public washroom?

Updated on Thursday, October 29, 2015



"I'm only 19 years old and I've already wasted my entire life"
- Overheard in the SLC

Updated on Monday, October 26, 2015



"It's like the difference between sucking a masculine dick and sucking a feminine dick"



Girl: "I'm such a ho, I always were my sexy underwear when I'm on my period. Why don't I just wear granny panties??"

Updated on Monday, October 19, 2015



Guy 1: You nervous about the midterm today?
Guy 2: No, not really.
Guy 1: For real? It's going to be mad difficult.
Guy 2: Well...if it's like last time. I got a 70 then the bell curve came in and it was like BAM! Got a ma fuckin' 90 bro.

Updated on Sunday, October 18, 2015


" my recollection, Shakespeare didn't contribute a lot to geophysics..."

Updated on Friday, October 16, 2015


Asian dude 1: "That dude has goose poop all over his backpack, should we tell him?"
Asian dude 2: "Nah that means we have a better chance with the ladies"


OVERHEARD: "I'm not sexually attracted to South Africa though"


OVERHEARD: "Golang lead me to Islam"

Updated on Saturday, October 10, 2015


OVERHEARD:"I got wasted sooo hard" - that Asian guy in M3


OVERHEARD:"Her vagina is the best" really people really -_-


OVERHEARD:"I look like a guy trying to hide a boner right now" from a girl outside DP

Updated on Thursday, October 8, 2015


"Do squirrels poop? I've never seen squirrels fucking poop."


"I like DP... the library, I mean."


"Babies are like parasites" - nutrition prof

Updated on Wednesday, September 30, 2015


Prof: If any man tells you he's never masturbated he's a liar!! Unless he has a medical condition, then it's okay. I went really off topic, where were we?