OMG UPDATE: OMG Becky, look at her butt.

Updated on Wednesday, July 23, 2014


Girl : I miss my boyfriend he's always away.
Boy : you mean our boyfriend ?


Oh come on now, everyone has herpes these days. No big deal.


At the Eng C&D, an undergrad wasn't able to afford what they got. Before they could put stuff back on the shelf though, a prof behind him in line offers to pay the remaining balance. He says, "It's the least I can do, after all, you're paying my salary."

He then jokingly said that he hoped that this gesture might raise his RateMyProf rating. I pointed out that it was a stupid site that only butthurt students went on and then he wondered on why he didn't have a red hot chili pepper by his name. We consoled him by pointing out that he probably didn't WANT twenty year olds being very attracted to him.

Updated on Friday, July 18, 2014


"When in doubt, whip it out" is a terrible phrase.

Updated on Monday, July 14, 2014


OVERHEARD: I stayed up all night but still failed the exam.

Updated on Friday, July 11, 2014


If this dropped in your car and sat for two days, you wouldn't eat it would you?


a female staffmember is bothering another in the Bombshelter
Girl 2: Stop eeeet... I willl stab you with a lemon.

Updated on Saturday, June 28, 2014


Guy 1: How was your weekend
Guy 2: Friday night went really well...but then I woke up on Saturday and realized I took an integral instead of a derivative!

Updated on Monday, June 23, 2014


"I was born in a Volvo. Heck, I was conceived in a Volvo."
-Guy waiting for bus at DC

Updated on Friday, June 20, 2014


OVERHEARD: "Economists are always wrong."

- Econ Prof


Professor: "It's course evaluation today, go easy on my please. Then again, I'm tenured so your opinion means nothing to me. And that is how I stay authentic."

Updated on Saturday, June 14, 2014


Heard this on the bus towards Cambridge:
(Note: Obviously not word for word, but this is essentially what happened)

Guy 1: Yo ,I don't even know who you are but I think we can make this work. You can date her.
Guy 2: What if I want you both too? (Guy 1 had a buddy)
Guy 1: Aw man it'll be like a love square?
Guy 2: Don't you mean triangle?
Guy 1: No.. I mean a square 'cause there's four of us. Well me and my buddy will be in the background.
Guy 2: Oh ok. So dude I totally forgot what an isosceles triangle is the other day What's a rectangular prism?

Then they went on to talk about how a triangular prism has a rectangle base. Yeah that's true... Any way you flip the triangular prism it will have a rectangular base. Also they has no idea what basic geometry was. BUT these guys were the highlight of my day. Funny people! They seem like nice ones too! Shame I didn't chime in to the conversation.

Complete strangers.

Updated on Friday, June 6, 2014


Prof: It was so much more fun to lecture when George Bush Jr was in office, the jokes were good, there was a lot of material. Now that there's a smart President it's harder to poke fun.

Updated on Sunday, June 1, 2014


We were talking about CS241, nicknamed "baby compiler course" in contrast to CS444 (the real, advanced compiler course)

Guy 1: Is that known as the baby compiler course?
Guy 2: What is a baby compiler?
Guy 3: Uterus.

Updated on Thursday, May 29, 2014


"I just want to walk on mountains and do lots of drugs"

Updated on Tuesday, May 20, 2014


SDS prof: "soooo how do males get off?" (when talking about teratogens, etc)


Trainer: Squeeze your butt! ... Because if you don't, no body else will!

Updated on Friday, May 16, 2014


Prof: So let's say you take a swimming pool and add half a teaspoon of salt. Then you shake the swimming pool to homogenize it. Don't ask me how, that's an engineering problem.


Prof: "when you finger the daemon..."


Justice League is totally progressive! There's like 2 women and 1 black dude out of 7 heroes!

Updated on Monday, May 12, 2014


Girl 1 to Girl 2: We used to go to Firehall and call it "Totally Extinguished."

Updated on Friday, April 25, 2014


Girl 1: Do you even cook?
Girl 2: Oh yeah I do! Just yesterday I found a really great recipe for waffles.
Girl 1: Oh ya?
Girl 2: Ya! You buy Pillsbury cinnamon buns and put them in the waffle maker and they come out like waffles!


Girl 1: Yeah I know they are related so it was kinda like incest, but I don't see what's wrong with that.
Girl 2: I know right? Sex is just sex.


*People laughing and playing never have I ever in res *

Girl 1: never have I ever had sex against a door
[long pause]
Girl 2: ... well it wasn't really against a door...


Guy: This math course uses too many numbers! This is not what I signed up for.